How to run RSVPs for a 600-guest Indian wedding without a spreadsheet

Six hundred guests is not six hundred replies. It is a few hundred families, invited to different functions, answering at different times through different cousins. That is why the guest list spreadsheet ends up in five versions on five phones, and why the caterer's number stays a guess until the last day. Here is a calmer way to run it.

1. Make one list from both families

Ask each side for their list in whatever form it lives today: a sheet, a notebook, a phone's contacts. Bring it into one place before you send anything. For each person you need a name, a phone number, which side they belong to, and their family, meaning the household that will reply together. A city and a short relation note, such as "Mama ji's son" or "college friend", help when two people share a name.

Expect duplicates. The same aunt will be on the bride's list and the groom's, once as Kokila Ben and once as Kokila Patel. Clean them out before anyone is invited, not after.

2. Count families, not people

A list of six hundred usually comes down to a few hundred households. Send one invitation and one link per family, and let each family say how many are coming to each function. One person answers for the family, so nobody is counted twice. Pick the person in each family who actually answers messages, which is often not the eldest.

Children are easier to count than to list. Ask how many children and infants are coming, rather than collecting names and ages you don't need. Your caterer needs the number, not the names.

3. Invite function by function

Not everyone comes to everything. The pithi and the mehendi may be close family; the sangeet and the wedding are for everyone; the reception may add colleagues and neighbours. Decide the guest list for each function before you send a single link, so every family is asked only about the functions they are invited to.

4. Send links the way your guests read messages

Most families will answer on WhatsApp, and many elders will answer nowhere else. Send each family its own message, from a number they recognise, with a short line about the wedding and their link. Avoid big group messages: replies get lost, and everyone sees everyone else's number.

Set a reply-by date that leaves a buffer before your caterer needs final numbers. Ask the caterer for their deadline first, then work back from it.

5. Chase gently, and share the job

A week after sending, plenty of families will not have answered. That is normal. Make a list of who is still waiting and send each family a short, warm reminder, not a group blast.

Share the work. Give a cousin the groom's college friends and a parent their own relatives, so nobody has to message two hundred people alone. Each helper only needs to see the families they are chasing.

6. Turn replies into numbers for the caterer

For every function you want three numbers, attending, declined and still waiting, plus the meal split. Gujarati weddings often need more than veg and non-veg: Jain and Swaminarayan meals have their own rules, so ask for them by name. Give the caterer a count for each function, and update it once more at their deadline.

7. Expect changes

Families change their plans. Make sure they can change their answer themselves, so you are not editing a sheet at midnight. If a link is forwarded too widely, replace it.

A rhythm you can adapt

• Two to three months before: one clean list, families grouped, sides and functions decided.
• Six to eight weeks before: links go out, family by family.
• Every week or so: one round of reminders for the families still waiting.
• At the reply-by date: a phone call to the last few.
• At the caterer's deadline: the final count for each function.

Move the dates to suit your wedding. What matters is that each step happens once, by one person, from one list.

How Krama Events does this

You import your list from a CSV file, up to 2,000 guests at a time. Krama matches the columns, groups families, and holds back likely duplicates, such as the same phone or the same name and city, until you tick them.

Each family gets one private RSVP link that covers every function they are invited to. Guests open it in any phone browser, with no app and no account, and answer Going or Can't for each function, with how many are coming and their meal choice. Children and infants are counted for the family, not listed by name.

Message on WhatsApp opens WhatsApp with a ready message and the family's own link, and you press send. Krama never messages your guests by itself. Invitations & reminders lists every family still to reply, with a reminder button beside each one, and your reply-by date shows on every RSVP page.

Helpers see only the guests of the functions they look after, or the guests you tag for them. Phone numbers stay masked for helpers, who can still call with a tap.

Headcounts shows who is coming to each function and the meal split, with options such as veg, Jain and Swaminarayan, and a CSV download for your caterer. Families can change their reply with the same link, Reset link replaces one that was shared by mistake, and any guest can remove their details from their RSVP page.

A word on privacy

A guest list is hundreds of phone numbers. Keep it in one private place, share only what each helper needs, and delete it when the wedding is over. Krama does that last part for you: your whole workspace is deleted automatically after the date you choose.

If that sounds like the wedding you want to run, start planning and bring your list in today.